Lanzagrotty

Just been away on a family holiday in . We stayed at the Sands Beach Resort in for a week.

I must start with the usual disclaimer before I hurl headlong into bitching about the place… đŸ™‚
ie: We had a really good holiday. Victoria and I had some good relaxation in the sun and the kids seemed to really enjoy themselves too.

Now, too the bitching… I’ve purposely avoided the Costa’s etc all my life, for all the reasons that I hated Lanzarote.

The place we stayed at was nice enough. The complex has 6 pools surrounded by apartments. The apartments are nice, clean, and functional, and the fact that they sit on one of the poolsides means you don’t have to fight for pool space and the kids could pretty much come and go as they please. In fact we were able to sit on your terrace in the sun and watch the kids play. There was never a real need to do anything other than stay in the sun round the pool, and on that basis we could have been anywhere in the world… that is anywhere with a warm climate!

The problem comes when you leave the apartment and venture around the good for nothing volcanic rock that is Lanzarote. It seems that someone many many years ago realised that the place was a complete waste of space that could contribute anything at all to the world. Having failed to grow any vegetation on it they decided to build some swimming pools, some white hotels, and egg and chips resteraunts, and the brits would come… and come they did.

The place is all about white socks and Jesus sandles, egg and chips, english breakfasts, fat blokes in too short shorts with burnt bellies, football kits, sports bars and pubs showing eastenders and corrie. There are about 5 style of shops all selling the same thing. The restaurants are unable to offer anything that anyone else isn’t offering which is obviously what the brits want… so they all sell the same starters, pizza’s, burgers, full english, egg and chips etc, the same pasta, and on and on. This doesn’t matter what style of eatery it is either!

Sands Beach Apartments Sands Beach Apartments Sands Beach Apartments
Gloria Lights Sands Beach Apartments

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